So I've been seeing a lot of celebrities writing "letters to myself at 16" in Skymall magazines and such. And it got me thinking about how incredibly unhelpful those are. I mean you can't go back in time and apply all those things youve figured out. It's pointless. But I appreciate the idea and have decided to write a letter to myself at 18 from my 18yr old self. Careful piglets things get a little deep, but I figured my fellow piggies would understand. Let the Soul searching begin.
Dear Sam,
Im writing you this letter because I know you're trying to make sense of the world and figure yourself out, but who better to help you find yourself than yourself? Nobody. I know things are really confusing right now. You aren't sure what to do with your emotions and trust me you have a lot of them. I'm here to let you know that it's ok. First of all stop spending so much time in the mirror. I know when you see yourself you see just a small troll with a bob. You see every flaw even down to the little scars you blame on that cat attacking you. you see every split end, blemish, possible wrinkle. But when I look at you, when I really step back and look at you, I see a very beautiful girl. I think you just need to let go of stupid flaws and let yourself be beautiful too. You also need to get more sleep. I know it's hard for you and the second you lay down every thought and feeling you suppress during the day comes at you. But maybe that's a sign to stop suppressing everything. You've pushed a lot of people away in your life because you've been unable to tell them how you feel. How happy they made you or how they've actually hurt you. Stop being so cold. Let yourself cry when your sad. Let other people know when your happy. Also it's ok to be alone. I know you hate it, but take this time to figure you out. Figure out what went wrong all the other times and learn from it. But please, don't ever get content with being by yourself. Its ok to want to be in love. Everyone else wants it too even if they don't want to admit it. But this time let's wait to be with someone who likes you for you. Who thinks your jokes are funny, likes how you write, finds you as beautiful as I do, and thinks it's cool to be weird. Oh and who wants to feed you. Hey, a girl can dream. Just be you Sam. You may be weird and hard to understand but I get you and i love you. And it's not just me who feels this way! Put your mind as ease and know that at the end of the day you always have yourself to talk to. Which you do often.. Might need to cut back on that in public. Oh and please never stop compensating with humor. It makes ending deep letters to yourself that you post on the internet much less awkward.
Love,
You (Sam)
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Monday, December 5, 2011
The Pursuit of Happiness
Hello Piglets,
This is your fearless leader speaking. The last few weeks have been a roller coaster of amazing highs and incredible lows. Yet I feel like this this range of happiness happens to me every year. SO, I have decided to make this winter one of utter bliss. Like gourmet marshmallows from William Sonoma happiness or that feeling of getting your first Louis... well maybe not that happy but we will shoot for it! Here are a few goals of mine to make my winter perfect and hopefully yours too!
1) Function and Fashion: Looking Cute While Being Snug as a Bug in a Rug
This winter y'all need to stock up on a few winter essentials. These should be basic staples to your winter wardrobe. I'm talkin' a trench coat, monochromatic sweater dress, a sweater with a hint of shimmer, leggings, boots, and a giant scarf with fur trim. If you have one of each of these bad boys you will be set for the rest of your days.
This is your fearless leader speaking. The last few weeks have been a roller coaster of amazing highs and incredible lows. Yet I feel like this this range of happiness happens to me every year. SO, I have decided to make this winter one of utter bliss. Like gourmet marshmallows from William Sonoma happiness or that feeling of getting your first Louis... well maybe not that happy but we will shoot for it! Here are a few goals of mine to make my winter perfect and hopefully yours too!
1) Function and Fashion: Looking Cute While Being Snug as a Bug in a Rug
This winter y'all need to stock up on a few winter essentials. These should be basic staples to your winter wardrobe. I'm talkin' a trench coat, monochromatic sweater dress, a sweater with a hint of shimmer, leggings, boots, and a giant scarf with fur trim. If you have one of each of these bad boys you will be set for the rest of your days.
2) Artistic Nourishment:
In my opinion the winter is a perfect time to get in touch with your creative side. This doesn't mean putting paint on a canvas, but instead creating something that not only inspires you, but your peers. If your handy with a brush, go for it, but if your just a mere mortal like me, you can let out your inner Monet in a number of ways. For me I like to take the digital route i.e my blog (yes that means I will actually be posting this winter.) but if you don't want to devote yourself to the blog-o-shpere you can get savvy with something like Pinterest or Tumblr. Post pictures of things that are inspiring you and share them with your friends! Nothing sounds better than sitting down with a cup of cocoa, wrapped up in a Little Giraffe Blanket and click clacking away on the old Mac book.
3) A Winter Romance
It seems like around this time of year relationships seem to dwindle. This year I am determined to keep my love life as warm as a chestnut roasting by an open fire. This means no braving the cold with a hat and no make up. No staying in on Friday nights because 25 Days of Christmas is on. This means solely looking cute on New Years for the distinct purpose of snagging a kiss when the ball drops. For those of you with a significant other, PLEASE keep shaving your legs and PLEASE do all of those cheesy wintery dates you've always wanted to do. Don't let the cold make your relationship go frigid. Step up your game this winter piglets, the mistletoe is calling.
4) Spend Some Time With Ye Besties
This winter break spend some quality time with your best friends. Don't let the hustle and bustle of your mom's friend's christmas parties get in the way of the people who always have your back. Before going to a christmas party, have your friends over for manis and pedis. Dedicate a week night to re watching all of your favorite christmas movies. Make puppy chow.... mmm puppy chow.
Go forth and be merry piglets!! Be merry and bright!
Monday, October 17, 2011
How to Duck Your Head in Shame
Hello piglets it has been too long since I have posted! I promise I will never be gone this long again. Anyways, I have been struggling to find something worthwhile to post given that my life has been so mundane lately, but have found inspiration in the trials and tribulations of my friends. So here we go..
This is a Polished Piglet's guide to avoiding awkward run in's with people you never want to see again. I'm pretty sure everyone has a person in their life that they always run into that they once dated, hooked up with, worked with, spilled punch on their chinos bla bla bla, and it's always super awkward. Well I have developed a few sure-fire rules, that if followed, will help you piglets avoid these uncomfortable moments that make you want to gouge your eyes out with pencils. #2 Ticonderoga's to be exact. Watch and learn pigs!
1) NEVER, I mean NEVER, go anywhere by yourself or without your cell phone. This is because if you see or are seen by that certain someone, you need to look like you have way more important people to talk to than them. So walking to class, see their little rat face, whip out your phone and start texting. Sitting at lunch, they walk in with their bro's, instantly turn to your friend and look like you are solving world issues, even if you are just whispering "oh my god please dont look over here" under your breath a few hundred times.
2) Always walk with your head down. Let them stare at the top of your head all they want, no need to look into their Medusa eyes.
3) Never walk through a door without doing the double-check. As you walk through the door check left, check right, then bolt to wherever you need to go. Just like pulling out into a busy street. This will save you from possibly colliding your body into theirs.
4) Dont take elevators, always the stairs, just to avoid the slight chance that you could possibly be stuck in a little metal box with that guy you made out with for an hour last night, even tho you went to the party with his roommate....... yikes.
5) Avoid the gym, cafeteria, laundry room, health center, fro-yo place, and any party of the frat/team they belong to for at least a week after the deed, because you WILL see them.
6) Take alternate routes. It might help to stalk them for a little bit and then make sure to never go that way again for the rest of your life.
Or.. you could go about your life normally and face this person with a smile and an attitude that says you really don't give a shit.....Ha! Ya right, who are you kidding? You live in too much shame for that.
Peace. Love. Yellow Cake with Buttercream Frosting.
This is a Polished Piglet's guide to avoiding awkward run in's with people you never want to see again. I'm pretty sure everyone has a person in their life that they always run into that they once dated, hooked up with, worked with, spilled punch on their chinos bla bla bla, and it's always super awkward. Well I have developed a few sure-fire rules, that if followed, will help you piglets avoid these uncomfortable moments that make you want to gouge your eyes out with pencils. #2 Ticonderoga's to be exact. Watch and learn pigs!
1) NEVER, I mean NEVER, go anywhere by yourself or without your cell phone. This is because if you see or are seen by that certain someone, you need to look like you have way more important people to talk to than them. So walking to class, see their little rat face, whip out your phone and start texting. Sitting at lunch, they walk in with their bro's, instantly turn to your friend and look like you are solving world issues, even if you are just whispering "oh my god please dont look over here" under your breath a few hundred times.
2) Always walk with your head down. Let them stare at the top of your head all they want, no need to look into their Medusa eyes.
3) Never walk through a door without doing the double-check. As you walk through the door check left, check right, then bolt to wherever you need to go. Just like pulling out into a busy street. This will save you from possibly colliding your body into theirs.
4) Dont take elevators, always the stairs, just to avoid the slight chance that you could possibly be stuck in a little metal box with that guy you made out with for an hour last night, even tho you went to the party with his roommate....... yikes.
5) Avoid the gym, cafeteria, laundry room, health center, fro-yo place, and any party of the frat/team they belong to for at least a week after the deed, because you WILL see them.
6) Take alternate routes. It might help to stalk them for a little bit and then make sure to never go that way again for the rest of your life.
Or.. you could go about your life normally and face this person with a smile and an attitude that says you really don't give a shit.....Ha! Ya right, who are you kidding? You live in too much shame for that.
Peace. Love. Yellow Cake with Buttercream Frosting.
Friday, September 30, 2011
Please Taylor Lautner, Take Your Shirt Back Off
So my roommate and trusty sidekick, Jordan, is a Taylor Lautner fan. This means countless hours spent watching a monkey with abs and the voice of a prepubescent girl, try to read words off a page. Tonight I wanted to see 50/50, a film with real actors and some artistic value, but of course it was sold out. So we had to see Abduction, T-Lauts newest disaster. I tried to comfort myself with two boxes of Whoppers, a medium popcorn with extra butter, and the hope that the sound would go out and he would take his shirt off, but for some reason some fool decided to convince Taylor Lautner that he was good for anything besides being straight up eye candy. Let me break this down for you: T-Laut cries probably 45% of the whole movie, laughs like a little girl, randomly jumps off of stuff like a spider monkey, and when he finally gets down to the dirty with that one girl from The Blindside, he decides he's hungry and needs a sandwich. But hey, at least he's not wearing cut-off jean shorts. Why such hate for Taylor you wonder? Well I assure you it has nothing to do with Team Edward or Jacob, even though everyone knows vampires are better anyways.... It has to do with the lack of substance coming from Hollywood these days. I'm over pieces of ass like T-Laut and the whole cast of Transformers becoming famous off of simply being hot. It reinforces the notion that hot people don't have to do anything and it drives average to semi-attractive girls to cook and clean and go to school and try and be funny, and thats a lot of friggin effort! ..... deep breaths. Anyways. I am just saying I would like to see a little more talent and a little less T&A in the movies these days. Also I went to a Capital Grille today and got their signature burger. O.M.G amaze. The key is that their beef patty is a trifecta of ground beef, bacon, and caramelized onion. They put bacon.. in the beef! *Happiness*
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| Cut it out Shark Boy |
Thursday, September 29, 2011
An Ode to the Burger and A Plea to Justin Timberlake
Well piglets I think it's time to get personal. Something you must know about me is that there is one thing I can never EVER say no to... a cheeseburger. There is nothing better than a hunk of juicy beef, covered in melted cheese, topped with crisp lettuce, and smothered in ketchup with a hint of mustard and mayo. *wipes drool* I could live off of burgers for the rest of my life, which would probably lead to morbid obesity and constantly smelling like a Five Guys but I'd do it. I would. Happily. And I'm sure there are a few of you out there who would join me. It's cool we'll get jackets or something. Anyways I plan on eventually reviewing some of my favorite places to get a good burger but this whole school thing is really putting a hitch in my professional blogger life. In the meantime I'm going to give you a few of my favorite variations of the burger for you guys to try at your favorite place! Also PLEASE comment your favorite burger and where to get it so I can continue eat food and write about it!
Blue Cheese + Bacon+ Chipotle Mayo
The blue cheese is a must because its a strong flavor but is still complimentary to the meat. The bacon is key because it's bacon and that's all I have to say about that. And the final touch is the chipotle mayo, which depending on how strong it is, gives the burg the right amount of heat but doesn't require a glass of milk. Dutches does this rendition nicely.
Pastrami + Blue Cheese
The blue cheese is a given and you would think the pastrami would give the burger some like super weird flavor but it doesn't. If you are a salt person you would like this.
Apple + Prosciutto
Adding apple or pear to a burger gives it a crisp and slightly sweet flavor that counter balances the meaty taste of the beef and the saltiness of the prosciutto perfectly. It truly is the yin and yang of food.
My next bit of beef comes with Justin Timberlake. Now don't get me wrong, he is totally bringing sexy back, but not with his acting. His nasally, obnoxious, over the top facial expressions which we have all been forced to sit through this year with Bad Teacher to Friends With Benefits MUST stop. So here I am, virtually looking Justin straight in the eye and pleading: Please stop trying to act. Alpha Dog wasn't even that great. Please just let Jessica Biel handle it and go back to singing about the girls that got away.. like Cameron Diaz. in yo face JT!
Blue Cheese + Bacon+ Chipotle Mayo
The blue cheese is a must because its a strong flavor but is still complimentary to the meat. The bacon is key because it's bacon and that's all I have to say about that. And the final touch is the chipotle mayo, which depending on how strong it is, gives the burg the right amount of heat but doesn't require a glass of milk. Dutches does this rendition nicely.
Pastrami + Blue Cheese
The blue cheese is a given and you would think the pastrami would give the burger some like super weird flavor but it doesn't. If you are a salt person you would like this.
Apple + Prosciutto
Adding apple or pear to a burger gives it a crisp and slightly sweet flavor that counter balances the meaty taste of the beef and the saltiness of the prosciutto perfectly. It truly is the yin and yang of food.
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| Blue Cheese |
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| Apple! oh this looks good.. |
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| Pastrami |
My next bit of beef comes with Justin Timberlake. Now don't get me wrong, he is totally bringing sexy back, but not with his acting. His nasally, obnoxious, over the top facial expressions which we have all been forced to sit through this year with Bad Teacher to Friends With Benefits MUST stop. So here I am, virtually looking Justin straight in the eye and pleading: Please stop trying to act. Alpha Dog wasn't even that great. Please just let Jessica Biel handle it and go back to singing about the girls that got away.. like Cameron Diaz. in yo face JT!
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| Good Justin |
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| Decent.. namely because he had his shirt off a lot |
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| Bad Teacher... Bad Acting |
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| .....please no more.... |
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
All Roads Lead to Youtube
Oh boy piglets it's been a long week, and I just realized I have to do laundry. Just another setback of college. ANYWAYS I was attempting to de-stress by listening to R&B and drinking chocolate milk and it just didn't work. I just couldn't shake the thoughts of.. stuff. Pointless, mindless, mundane stuff that is required of this so called illustrious college life. So I did what any person in their right mind would do when they need to get a grip: Youtube.
Here are some excellent vids to get you through Will Power Wednesday.
Malk by Julian Smith. One of his funnier videos besides Beached Whale.
Boys Will Be Girls by Harvard Sailing Team. AMAZING.
more amazing than ice cream. yes, it's possible.
And now... my favorite video of all time
Jackie and Debra starring John Roberts.
nuff.said
For all my film buff piggies or if those of you who don't have ADD need a nice break from the "real world", go to Netflix and watch Paper Moon. This 1973 Bogdanovich film is timeless, hilarious, and the connection between father-daughter costars Ryan O'Neal and Tatum O'Neal is amazing. It's about 102 minutes long so you could easily pretend to do math homework and some light reading while you watch.
Snack recommendations: cheesy popcorn. Do it! Do it! Do it!
Here are some excellent vids to get you through Will Power Wednesday.
Malk by Julian Smith. One of his funnier videos besides Beached Whale.
Boys Will Be Girls by Harvard Sailing Team. AMAZING.
more amazing than ice cream. yes, it's possible.
And now... my favorite video of all time
Jackie and Debra starring John Roberts.
nuff.said
For all my film buff piggies or if those of you who don't have ADD need a nice break from the "real world", go to Netflix and watch Paper Moon. This 1973 Bogdanovich film is timeless, hilarious, and the connection between father-daughter costars Ryan O'Neal and Tatum O'Neal is amazing. It's about 102 minutes long so you could easily pretend to do math homework and some light reading while you watch.
Snack recommendations: cheesy popcorn. Do it! Do it! Do it!
Harry, David, and a Leopard Scarf
Ello Pig-let. I have two things for you to munch on today...
As I moved from crescent lunge to warrior II in my yoga sesh this morning, I felt an oh too familiar rumble in my tummy: Hunger. My mind instantly flashed to a hometown food haven, Harry & David and their delicious assortment of munchies and crunchies. Why H&D you ask? I don't know, maybe it's the start of fall and I'm feeling nostalgic or maybe it's because I'm patiently awaiting a gift basket from home. Regardless, Harry & David are two names that should be in any Polished Piglet's black book. I'm sure many of you have seen their stores wedged somewhere between an Apple store and a Capital Grille, but their headquarters are located right in little Southern Oregon. Harry & David's repertoire consists of the world's greatest gift baskets filled with confections like Hand-Dipped Chocolate Pears, Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake, Chocolate Truffles, and not to mention the perfect combination of sweet and salty: Moose Munch. So piglets next time you go into downward dog and all you can think about is food, go get a chocolate dipped pear from Harry & David.
The Second thing I have to offer this morning is an accessory I feel no girl should live without: a leopard scarf. It can go with pretty much anything, anytime, anywhere. Take your basic skinny jean-white T-shirt-flats combo, add a leopard scarf and you have gone from basic to stylish in one second. Wrap it tight around your neck with a black pea coat for winter. Tie it up in your hair for a funky look. AND because it's black and tannish brownish it can pretty much go with almost any color you wear. This is an item every piglet needs, just don't spill your curry on it. Check check ah check it outtt. (BTW check the links on the pictures!)
As I moved from crescent lunge to warrior II in my yoga sesh this morning, I felt an oh too familiar rumble in my tummy: Hunger. My mind instantly flashed to a hometown food haven, Harry & David and their delicious assortment of munchies and crunchies. Why H&D you ask? I don't know, maybe it's the start of fall and I'm feeling nostalgic or maybe it's because I'm patiently awaiting a gift basket from home. Regardless, Harry & David are two names that should be in any Polished Piglet's black book. I'm sure many of you have seen their stores wedged somewhere between an Apple store and a Capital Grille, but their headquarters are located right in little Southern Oregon. Harry & David's repertoire consists of the world's greatest gift baskets filled with confections like Hand-Dipped Chocolate Pears, Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake, Chocolate Truffles, and not to mention the perfect combination of sweet and salty: Moose Munch. So piglets next time you go into downward dog and all you can think about is food, go get a chocolate dipped pear from Harry & David.
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The Second thing I have to offer this morning is an accessory I feel no girl should live without: a leopard scarf. It can go with pretty much anything, anytime, anywhere. Take your basic skinny jean-white T-shirt-flats combo, add a leopard scarf and you have gone from basic to stylish in one second. Wrap it tight around your neck with a black pea coat for winter. Tie it up in your hair for a funky look. AND because it's black and tannish brownish it can pretty much go with almost any color you wear. This is an item every piglet needs, just don't spill your curry on it. Check check ah check it outtt. (BTW check the links on the pictures!)
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| Chan Luu- Light Tortoise Cashmere and Silk Leopard Print Scarf |
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| Thanks Sienna for being perfect and rocking the LV leopard stole |
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| ASOS Leopard Print Headscarf |
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
To indulge or not to indulge? but calories are the question..
Some things, piglets, are worth indulging. Others are just a waste of precious calories. Here I will break down two polished piglet life savers that are worth every penny; Skinny Cow Mini Fudge Pops and the Last Call Store by Neiman Marcus.
Ever had those last night snack cravings that can only be quelled by shoving your face with absurd amounts of chocolate? Of course you do, you're a pork chop. But have no fear for Skinny Cows are here. Located in your local grocery store frozen treat section are Skinny Cow Mini Fudge Pops. Each pop has only 50 calories and 1g of fat. Yes this means 12-1.5 fl oz of icy chocolate heaven. So next time you are sitting alone in your room, tempted by the siren calls of warm butter pound cake, take the polished route and go for a Skinny Cow.
My next polished piglet life saver is Last Call Store by Neiman Marcus. Imagine walking into a store, picking up a Marc Jacob's sweater and its more than 50% off.... Holy. Balls. This piglets is a reality. At a last call store you can get up to 70% off normal NM prices on designers like Alice + Olivia, MICHAEL Michael Kors, Proenza Schouler, Lanvin, Ella Moss, James Perse, and pretty much any other designer you could think of. YAY. The best part about the Last Call experience is the fact that because everything is almost half off.. no guilt. So piglets I say indulge! Take pride in that footlong receipt, just like you'd take pride in a footlong hot dog... with ketchup... and a side of fries.
Ever had those last night snack cravings that can only be quelled by shoving your face with absurd amounts of chocolate? Of course you do, you're a pork chop. But have no fear for Skinny Cows are here. Located in your local grocery store frozen treat section are Skinny Cow Mini Fudge Pops. Each pop has only 50 calories and 1g of fat. Yes this means 12-1.5 fl oz of icy chocolate heaven. So next time you are sitting alone in your room, tempted by the siren calls of warm butter pound cake, take the polished route and go for a Skinny Cow.
My next polished piglet life saver is Last Call Store by Neiman Marcus. Imagine walking into a store, picking up a Marc Jacob's sweater and its more than 50% off.... Holy. Balls. This piglets is a reality. At a last call store you can get up to 70% off normal NM prices on designers like Alice + Olivia, MICHAEL Michael Kors, Proenza Schouler, Lanvin, Ella Moss, James Perse, and pretty much any other designer you could think of. YAY. The best part about the Last Call experience is the fact that because everything is almost half off.. no guilt. So piglets I say indulge! Take pride in that footlong receipt, just like you'd take pride in a footlong hot dog... with ketchup... and a side of fries.
Calling All Piggies!
Hello fellow piglets. If you are reading this you probably love food, fashion, film, music, or in most cases D all of the above Either way, glad you're here. Now your probably wondering- what exactly is a polished piglet? Let me break this down. If you wake up in the morning, grab your Louis, and head straight for an Ol' South Pancake House to order a dutch baby, you probably are a polished piglet. If you spend your monthly budget at a Movie Tavern, you probably are a polished piglet. If you look like a walking J Crew catalog but can tell the difference between Kansas City barbecue and Texas barbecue, well my friend you ARE a polished piglet. This is about being the perfect combination of a hungry girl and a classy girl. You got to know your food and be able to strut your stuff with a bucket of chicken under your arm. I'm talking ketchup stains on your Sevens and a box of Thin Mints in your Longchamp. But this blog ins't just about pigging out whenever on whatever, it's about indulging in the finer things. Here I will discuss the great restaurants, shops, movies, and music I find, in hopes that you'll like them too. So welcome piggies, welcome to the blog of milk and honey... and shoes.
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